Steve and his buddies were hanging out and planning an upcoming fishing trip. Unfortunately, he had to tell them that he couldn’t go this time because his wife wouldn’t let him. After a lot of teasing and name calling, Steve headed home frustrated.
The following week when Steve’s buddies arrived at the lake to set up camp, they were shocked to see Steve. He was already sitting at the campground with a cold beer, swag rolled out, fishing rod in hand, and a camp fire glowing. “How did you talk your missus into letting you go Steve?”
“I didn’t have to,” Steve replied.
“Yesterday, when I left work, I went home and slumped down in my chair with a beer to drown my sorrows because I couldn’t go fishing. Then my lady Snuck up behind me and covered my eyes and said, ‘Surprise’. When I peeled her hands back, she was standing there in a beautiful see through negligee and she said, ‘Carry me into the bedroom, tie me to the bed and you can do whatever you want,’ So, Here I am!”
A young man from Nebraska moves to Florida and goes to a big “everything under one roof” department store looking for a job.
The manager asks, “Do you have any sales experience?”
The man replies, “Yeah, I was one of the best footwear salesmen back in Omaha.”
The boss likes the guy and gives him the job. “You can start tomorrow. I’ll come down after we close and see how you did.”
His first day on the job is rough, but he gets through it.
After the store is locked up, the boss comes down. “How many customers bought something from you today?” The man responds, “One.”
The boss says, “Just one? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day.
How much was the sale for?”
“$101,237.65.”
“How is it possible? What did you sell?”
“First, I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fish hook.
Then I sold him a large fish hook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast.
I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department, and I sold him a twin engine Boston Whaler. Then he said he didn’t think his car would pull it, so I took him down to the automobile department and sold him a 4×4 truck with all the bells and whistles.”
“A guy came in here to buy a fish hook, and you sold him a boat and a truck?”
“No, the guy came in here to buy diapers for his kid, and I said, ‘Dude, your weekend’s shot. You should go fishing.’”
One recent Sunday, a young boy arrived to his Sunday school class late.
His teacher knew that the boy was usually very prompt and asked him if anything was wrong. The boy replied no, that he was going to go fishing, but that his dad told him that he needed to go to church instead. The teacher was very impressed and asked the boy if his father had explained to him why it was more important to go to church rather than to go fishing.
To which the boy replied, “Yes, ma’am, he did. My dad said that he didn’t have enough bait for both of us.”